Selective mutism

So, because I can, I watched a few movies this week, something I haven't done in a long time, because although I am in vacations, I'm really not, and I've been working, working in lots of things, and what has been working the most is my head.
Thinking if it was the right choice.
All I ever wanted was to travel, to live somewhere that is not this place, to move and keep on moving, just staying a few years on each place, but now, I'm 25 and I acepted this job, a job that could be someones dream life job, a job, where you can grow within, a job that will grow with you and take you higher up. But I never wanted this. I never wanted to be a corporate woman. And to turn down such an opportunaty, it just wasn't possible. When will such an opportunaty knock on my door again? Never. But the bigger question is, if it isn't something you want, is it an opportunaty still?

And I wonder, I wonder, Am I doing the right thing?
All I want is to go.
Go. Go somewhere. Go to the future and see where this is bringing me. Go back in time and rethink things.

One of the movies I watched brought me back to a certain time in my life...
Selective mutism is an interesting subject. And I know how it feels. I know the jaw pain of that. Although mine could not be called selective, was more of an indifference mutism.
Somehow, wierd has it can be, I miss it. I miss those feelings.