domingo, 20 de dezembro de 2015

Down under

Esta semana descobri mais um sintoma relacionado com stress e ansiedade, problemas 'down there'.

segunda-feira, 14 de dezembro de 2015

Ulceras

Anda ai uma onda de má sorte...
Na viagem desapareceu-me a mala.
Parti uma garrafa de cerveja.
A comida sai-me mal.
Encomendas online todas trocas, mais perdas de dinheiro...
Tá difícil de arranjar o candeeiro.
Pesadelos todas as noites, é raptos, é perdas, é assaltos, é mortes, é sangue, é tudo!

quarta-feira, 9 de dezembro de 2015

Comem-me o figado.

terça-feira, 8 de dezembro de 2015

Ansiedade

Há pessoas que não percebem como a ansiedade pode ser incapacitante.
Primeiro, evito ir a certos sítios e forço-me a ir a tantos outros. Muitas vezes penso "não quero ir" e depois penso "tenho de ir" quando o que devia pensar era "awesome, vamos lá".
Depois, enquanto lá ando, fico paranóica com o que as outras pessoas dizem, e enervo-me com tanto disparate. E depois sinto que está tudo muito lento, ou serei eu que ando muito acelerada? E fico só com metade do ar.
Tenho frequência daqui a dois dias, e ando há três dias com um pequeno enjoo e com falta de ar. Será que é ansiedade por causa do teste? Eu nem sequer me consigo concentrar para estudar. Cada vez que penso em abrir o caderno dá-me o sono.

sexta-feira, 4 de dezembro de 2015

Scams

A few weeks ago I set up a goal, I decided to post a pic a day on deviantArt and one pic a day on Instagram, to write something meaningful in my diary at least once a week, and to post at least once a week something in here. All thing must be different. I've been keeping up with my goal.

This weeks post is about scams.
I think that in live we are scamed multiple times, by companies, by shops, by products, by institutions, by people, by ourselfs (that one is probably called self sabotage). Never the less, we can find scams everywhere.
Recently "black friday" scamed many people in beliving they were saving up by buying on that day. I did try to find some good deals on black friday, but what I found were scams, so I ended up not buying anything but an Hymalian salt lamp.

I also found that even when you are not the "victim" of a scam, if you still feel like it was scam, you will believe it was a scam.

A few days ago I went to Lisbon to an OCD specialized clinic to get a diagnoses.
Surprisingly, the clinic was located on a social neighbourhood, with lots of grafities and broken cars, and although I'm not racist or xenofob, I did see a lot of gypsies, africans, arabians and turquish people on the street in the middle of the day doing nothing. The looks of the place were not the best either...  First, they didn't have a big enough sign for me to spot the clinic right away. Then when I finally found it didn't have the look of a clinic. The front desk and the back office were both in an open hall, where I met some shady looking people standing around. I did look for some sort of certificate on the walls and the diploma from the doctor on her office, but I didn't see anything relevant nor anything that couldn't be forged/part of the farce. And the most noticeable thing on the wall was the map of the metro... Why?
Now if we take in mind that that clinic requires a 40euros montly associate payment, plus 50euros for the diagnoses appointment and 25euros for each of the next terapeutic sessions, which occur every week, I would expect something way more fancy.
And the doctor that made my diagnoses didn't started the appointment by explaining me what the clinic does nor handing me out a formular for me to fill in with my data. She made me some questions, but never took note of my answers, and at the end she did spent about 15mins explaining to me how import it was (or is) for me to be an associate of their clinic so I can benefit from all their terapeutic offers.

Now, there's two options, either they really are a proper clinic or they aren't. And on that hand, I'm either OCD and paranoid or a very suspicious person, or both.

Now with all that info in mind, (scam, OCD, terapy, money) I have to figure out what to do, and I started with writing this down while meditating on the subjet. Maybe I should write to Becca and ask her what she thinks.

quinta-feira, 3 de dezembro de 2015

How to overcome trust issues?
Trusting...